A key way to try and engage a reluctant new dad or dad-to-be, then, is to tell him that he is important and has a vital role to play; having a resource that has been written specifically for him helps to support that. Reassuringly, in the various NHS areas where the DadPad is currently being used, we have had interactions with same-sex commissioners and health professionals who understand and fully support our argument that changing the wording to be generic (i.e. from ‘DadPad’ to ‘ParentPad’) would only lead to non-engaged dads failing to identify with the resource, and thus completely defeating its primary purpose. What are we going to do about it? Secondly, it’s now recognised that PND is caused by a combination of two things – hormonal changes and situational changes. Mental health campaigner and educator, Dr Andy Mayers, explains: It’s important to be open to the fact that – even if you and/or your partner have no history of mental health problems – it is something that you might need to deal with. Preparation and communication are both key. It’s also for perinatal healthcare professionals wanting more information and guidance on how best to support the LGBTQI+ parents-to-be and new parents in their care, to ensure that those people feel safe, welcomed, comfortable and respectfully cared for. Why do new co-parents need it? Looking at these figures, then, we can already see that the vast majority of children in the UK are – despite definite changes – being raised by a father and a mother living in the same house.

Funding from the National Lottery’s Awards4All allowed the concept to be developed. The rest of the development, production and initial printing was funded by Inspire Cornwall CIC, as part of their reinvestment in perinatal support for new families, within their profit-for-purpose mission. Attending appointments with your partner will help you feel more involved in the arrival of your new baby and also give you the opportunity to ask questions about things that may be worrying you. Thankfully, the greater availability of online courses and training post-Covid has meant we’re now able to attend much more training than would otherwise be viable (given that, at present, all of the team live in Cornwall!). In 2022, this has included: training by the Men’s Health Forum, looking at ways of making health services work better for men; the Smartline celebration conference, A new vision for health and housing, which also gave Julian the chance to share our story as a Smartline-supported community business; the launch event for a new book by Early Years specialist, Maureen Hunt, looking at ways of helping children to thrive and overcome the effect of disadvantage; and a number of safeguarding training sessions. One thing to consider is the reminder from the perinatal mental health team at Worcestershire not to forget “ how important sleep is and that sleep deprivation is a major issue in the postnatal period. Any steps which help both mum and dad get more sleep will be beneficial.”

In his TEDx talk, Mark Williams quotes some of the following statistics from various research studies:

The DadPad® - An essential guide for new dads, supporting new families in working together for their babies. GW: Whilst we’re incredibly proud to be trailblazing an essential guide for non-gestational parents-to-be, that’s not where we’d like our offer to LGBTQI+ parents-to-be to end, though, and, as our organisation continues to evolve, we are committed to ensuring that our resources do, too.Sometimes, when a child is in neonatal care, medical attention may be required for both baby and baby’s mum, initially leaving the dad completely alone to come to terms with the situation. This can be traumatic, and we hope that DadPad Neonatal will become a valuable tool to offer support and advice during this sensitive time. Greater Manchester Mental Health (NHS Foundation Trust) Provision of prioritized support during the perinatal period. Kerry Thomas – PANDAS: You are significant and your feelings are valid. Do not undermine your own thoughts struggling with your mental health, but equally do not underestimate the strength you have and the support available through PANDAS and the NHS for parents who are able to recover from perinatal mental illness. using medical terminology that the dads did not always understand – the DPNN provides dad with a glossary where he can look up these words or phrases for himself, empowering him to ask more questions and get more involved in discussions surrounding the care of his baby; and

ensuring better communication between parents and schools to help support children to learn. We need to look at opportunities for families, and especially fathers, to become more closely involved in school life through parents’ associations, as school governors, and as a result of home-school contracts DadPad Neonatal is the perfect device to bridge the gap between neonatal services and dads, helping them understand the terminology and processes their child may be involved with. The DadPad cards are a perfect communication device for neonatal units, where the sensitive nature of the units means that it is extremely important for dads to understand what is happening, be able to ask for help and therefore feel supported. care in a Neonatal Unit needs to be family-focused, with a huge involvement from both parents, but dad can often be missed or overlooked by staff, and even sometimes by baby’s mum, all of which can have a real negative impact on the family unit, going forward ­ – adopting the DPNN as part of the integrated care provided within a Neonatal Unit ensures that dad not only doesn’t get forgotten about, but is also made to feel valued and important; During that postnatal period, my personality changed. I remember punching the sofa, I bust my hand. I was avoiding situations. I was using alcohol… I couldn’t tell my wife how I was feeling because I didn’t want that to impact on her mental health. And I was actually having suicidal thoughts in the postnatal period as well. But as a man I was told just to man up and get on with it. “What have you got to be depressed about? You didn’t give birth to the baby.” I was more concerned about my wife. One of dad’s main roles at this time is likely to be the liaison between mum/hospital and home. When friends and family ask dad all the inevitable questions – what’s happened? what’s wrong with baby? why is baby on the neonatal unit? what treatment is baby receiving and why? etc – the DPNN will enable dad to have all the information he needs at his fingertips.

Contact form

Most of the existing, supposedly-parent-focused information on the internet has clearly been written specifically for mums, reflecting the years and years of history where childbirth, childcare and all associated functions were 100% the exclusive domain of women; it doesn’t take long, for example, to find references such as ‘when you give birth’ or ‘when you are breastfeeding’, which have been shown to put dads off and make them feel excluded. And then there’s the fact that many resources also use discriminatory and stereotypical phrases, like ‘getting dad to help mum with baby’– if you can’t immediately spot the issue with that one, try switching the proper nouns around and see how it sounds… 🙂 An average of 10.4% of fathers are depressed both pre- and post-natally, with the peak time for fathers’ depression being between three and six months post-birth (Paulson & Brazemore, 2010)