A Mindfulness Guide for the Frazzled

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I really like Ruby Wax and - to be honest - felt like I needed to read some good news in 2020, so this seemed like a good book for me right now. Probably closer to 4.5 actually. I remember Ruby Wax from my childhood, but didn't have a clue about her academic achievements, or her struggles with mental health. All of our meetings provide the same safe space to share, talk and listen; and you can find out more about our different meetings by visiting us at www.frazzledcafe.org.

To let everyone have a voice. Please respect one another by giving everybody the chance to contribute without interruption and by not dominating or disrupting the Also I'm not sure who is the target audience of the book, some parts read very light and even over explained, that made me think this is for the older generation who lost touch with technology and aren't informed. But having so much I formation delivered in a speedy way, made think it was for YA as they can take all of that in without many problems.

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Ruby's here to show you that behind the clouds, the sun still shines. So, do you want the good news? All in all, this is an uplifting and hopeful book and one that I would recommend to anyone who feels that the world is headed in the wrong direction. I can't quite embrace the mindfulness that Wax endorses so enthusiastically, but I'm totally on board with all the other messages in this engaging and positive book. I’ll be eagerly awaiting my printed copy when this is published, there are so many interesting points made here that I would like to bookmark and look into further. We know how important it is to stay connected in these unprecedented and uncertain times. Frazzled Cafe meetings are a supportive online community where you can come and talk in a safe, non-judgemental space about what’s really going on for you.

There are some hard truths in Ruby’s book, but you would have to have been a hermit in a cave not to have at least some awareness of the biggest issues. The main take away for me was the emphasis on the interconnectedness and interdependence of all life on earth, basically we’re all in this together whatever our species. Individual action and responsibility really is the key to dealing with issues, regardless of whether they’re local or global, and there are myriad ways for us all to do our bit to help. I found the book sobering, joyous and hopeful. There is a lot of food for thought in there and a lot of useful info about inspiring initiatives and resources. These include Ruby’s own Frazzled Cafe to help people who are finding life hard to cope with, i.e. most of us at some point in our lives - and especially so over the last few years. The problem is there are a number of evolutionary hiccups that were never ironed out; glitches in the mothership. Part of our brain still functions as if it is hundreds of thousands of years ago and we haven’t yet learned to adjust our dials for the 21st century. Rather than going on bitching about the shortcomings of being human, I thought I’d find out what we can do about it and that’s how I came to write A Mindfulness Guide for the Frazzled. Ruby Wax is public about her struggles with mental health, and so has been writing books to help others, and started Frazzled Cafes , which during Covid-19 is hosting online support meetings, and pre Covid-19 hosted in person meetings. Maybe it will again. To act with integrity. Please respect one another’s confidentiality and anonymity. Please do not name anyone or discuss anything you may hear in a meeting with others who have not attended.Frazzled shouldn’t be confused with stress. We need stress – otherwise no oomph, and no oomph means no civilisation. We never would have stood up on two legs without it –still an impossible feat in six-inch heels. Frazzled is a whole new thing: being stressed about being stressed, usually for something we’ve manufactured in our heads. Unanswerable concepts, like: “Why am I a failure?” Not even Einstein had an answer to that one. Ruby sensed the need for a place where people could come together and connect with others in a safe, supportive space. A place where people could talk about the overwhelming stresses of modern life, free from judgement. This is what motivated her to create Frazzled Cafe in 2017. This Mental Health Awareness Week (May 8-14), we revisit our interview with comedian Ruby Wax, who famously suffers from anxiety and depression, in which she reveals how to combat ‘frazzled’ moments in just three minutes.

And Now For The Good News... :To the Future with Love by Ruby Wax looks at different things like education and food to see what the good thigns are that are coming, or are here already, just not in a big way, yet. I know I'm definitely guilty of switching on the old autopilot and going through half my day only partially aware. It's partly a defence mechanism brought on by so much of my day (the work part, mostly) being so soul-destroyingly banal and repetitive. I think it's also a big swig of apathy, though, and that's something I think I need to be aware of and actively combat. If you haven't been able to get a place, please join a waitlist as you will be notified by our booking system if a place becomes available. These will be available for 15 minutes before they move on to the next person on the waiting list. To listen without offering solutions. Please focus your contribution on personal experiences and not political/thematic concepts. When speaking please focus on what resonates with you personally, not on providing answers or solutions to others. Instead of yet another bottle or bath bomb, why not give the gift of sanity?! At least it won’t end up in the bin. OK, so even I can’t wrap up sanity but I cangive something to brighten the weather conditions of someone’s mind. And in these dark winter days, that’s a welcome winner.

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It’s a strange conundrum, I say, this habit emotionally fragile people have of putting themselves in the limelight, especially with celebrity culture the bruising environment that it is. ‘Well, I don’t consider myself to be a celebrity – I’m very far from A-list,’ she says briskly. ‘Plus I’m not depressed all the time. And when I’m well, I work. It’s as simple as that.’

The Trust has partnered with MIND in Mid Herts and the local PCN (the Primary Care Network of our 3 GP surgeries) to create a Wellbeing Hub. Its aim is to support Harpenden residents who have concerns about their mental wellbeing at an early stage before they become unwell and need counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy. Ruby Wax arrived in Britain in 1977 to pursue an acting career. She says "I really could never find my niche. I was a terrible actress, I couldn't sing, I couldn't do characters, I couldn't do an English accent and I lived in England, so I was narrowing it down".It is impossible to deny her enthusiasm and personal trauma, her will to be well and compassion for fellow sufferers.” – Helen Davies, Sunday Times (paywall) Buy the book Her next mission is to create walk-in centres for people with mental health issues. ‘There’s not enough support; there aren’t enough shrinks,’ she says. ‘It helps to know you’re not alone.’ Ruby Wax’s 3 minute technique to feel less frazzled In reality however, her voice, down the line from where she and her family are taking a holiday in South Africa, is soft, and she sounds almost shy – not an adjective I’d have associated with her. ‘I love to travel,’ she says. ‘It’s how I relax.’ Ruby Wax began writing it in 2018 before the outbreak of Covid-19, but ends the book with some ‘Post Covid-19 Good News.’ Whilst researching for her book she found what she calls ‘green shoots of hope peeping through the soil of civilisation’ that ‘may just bloom into a brighter future.’ It’s easy reading, written clearly in a breezy conversational style, covering a large amount of information. She emphasises the importance of compassion and kindness, of community and on working for the good of all. Maybe, above all she focuses on the benefits of mindfulness and on positive experiences.